I’m Calling It Right Now, Johnny Cueto Is Tossing a Gem Tonight

crystal ball

I’m looking into my crystal ball and all signs are pointing to Johnny Cueto having a monster start in Colorado. Never been more sure of anything since the last time I said I’ve never been more sure of anything in my entire life. He’s due for a big one, scouts are on record as saying this is the biggest start of his career, and Cole Hammels just threw no no so anything short of a perfect game is going to go completely unrecognized by the national media in true Johnny Cueto fashion. Everything is tailor made for a Johnny gem. We’ll probably only give him a run or two in support because why the hell not? It’s only fitting at this point. Forget the whole Coors Field stigma. Johnny is an ace’s ace and it doesn’t matter if he’s pitching on a wiffle ball field or the motherfucking moon, when a guy like that needs to dig down deep and throw a gem more often than not that’s exactly what happens. I’m calling it right now, 8 innings, 4 hits, 10 K’s. If you need me, I’ll be posted on the couch with a bottle of rye and a pint of Ben & Jerry’s, bumping Break Up Song Radio on Pandora. Godspeed, Johnny.

About Q-Ball

Owner, operator Queencitybeerleague.com. AKA The Commish. Q-Ball is that asshole at the office who refuses to brew a fresh pot of coffee. Not because he doesn't want to, he's just too embarrassed to admit that he doesn't know how.
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