When B Simm said, “tell Wiz Khalifa he got the wrong colors”
We’re only a couple hours away from kickoff of preseason game number two, which means another week of trying to Miss Cleo the entirety of the Bengals season based off of at best two quarters of football. What are looking for this week? Well, for starters how about completely dispatching the hapless Bucs. I’m talking bullying their first and second units up and down the field and silencing the guns on that Jolly Rodger because that’s what superior football teams do. Make Jaemis look like the rookie that he is by confusing him with our defensive sets and pressure from the front four. Second order of business which I’m sure will dominate all the headlines tomorrow for better or for worse is AJ McCarron’s first NFL action. It’s been almost two full years since McCarron has played in any sort of football game, so it’ll be nice to see what he’s got in the tank as of right now. My heart says I’d like to see him struggle a little bit so that all of the Dalton haters will pipe down with the “AJ McCarron is gunning for Dalton’s job” talk (which barring major injury is absolutely not happening this season). My football savvy mind, however, wants AJ to succeed in a big way because as everybody knows, you need two quality quarterbacks in the NFL. As of right now, the Bengals have shown we only have 1, sometimes .5 depending on the game, so it’ll be nice if we can get another guy in the fold. Anyone is better than Josh Johnson.
And last, but certainly not least (and I do stress the not least part), please, for the love of God, Bengals, PLEASE STAY HEALTHY! Pretty please with sugar on top. Every year there’s always a point in the preseason where a big name or three goes down and everyone gets all up in arms about how the preseason is too long and four games isn’t worth superstars dropping like flies and unfortunately that time is now. The Steelers lost one of the Pouncey brothers (I don’t know which one is which) and the Packers lost Jordy Nelson in the same game, so fingers and toes crossed that the Bengals can finish out these last three preseason games unscathed. Tyler Eifert gave Bengals fans a scare when he went down for a bit earlier in the week and Mike Johnson has already been sidelined with a knee injury, but outside of that the Bengals have dodged a bullet. Hate to even say that. Just get healthy Bengals, that’s all we ask.
Let’s play some football.
Fuck the Bucs.