Week 5 Recap: 5-0 BABY!



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You may have noticed that a lot of these posts have spelling/grammatical errors because I more or less fire from the hip and don’t take time to proofread. This go around I can virtually guarantee you that there will be some errors because my hands are literally shaking again. That’s how fired up I am thinking about that game yesterday. Aw man, any more games like that and I’m liable to keel over and die of a coronary at the tender age of 25. WHAT. A. FOOTBALL. GAME. I know you’ve heard this a thousand times already, but there’s no way the old Bengals win that game. Not a chance in hell. In fact, there isn’t a chance in hell that anyone wins that game because apparently when teams lead 24-7 in the third quarter it’s almost mathematically impossible for them to lose

But not this team. No sir, this is a team of destiny. The stars have aligned and the forces of nature are literally on our side

I really don’t know what to say. The jaded Bengals fan in me wants to think that sooner or later my heart is going to be ripped out and stomped on right in front of my face. 25 years of disappointment has me waiting for the carriage to turn back into a pumpkin, but something is just different this year. I know you feel it too. Everything is coming up Bengals. Defensively this team has been porous at times, but that unit is able to step up and make plays when they need to. Same with the special teams. Nuge has been streaky at best, almost on the verge of getting cut, but the game winner, and more importantly, the kick that sent the game into OT were executed to perfection. I was shocked, SHOCKED at how well the entire field goal unit was able to line up and get a successful kick off as the clock was winding down at the end of the game. Playing into my point, there’s no way the old Bengals get that off. The clock runs out and we’d be sitting here on the verge of tears wishing death by stones for Marvin Lewis and his poor clock management.

Offensively, this juggernaut continues to roll. Jeremy Hill has been slow and at times the running game has struggled to get going, but cue Gio and Hue Jackson’s sticktoitiveness and the ground game has been good enough to keep defenses honest. That man Tyler Eifert continues to wow as well. I’m not ready to anoint him king of the NFL TE’s just yet, but he’s certainly in the conversation. we might not be in Gronk territory, but he’s certainly surpassed Jimmy Graham. Another big game, another clutch performance for the big guy. Largely, a lot of that credit probably goes to the guy slinging him the rock, a Mr. Andrew Gregory Dalton. Much like the season as a whole, I’m sort of waiting for Cinderella’s evening to come to a close, but so far I’m just not seeing any signs of that happening yet. I don’t think there’s any doubting that the pundits lofty MVP talk thus far is well warranted. The numbers are certainly there, but more than anything is the leadership and the confidence he’s shown thus far in leading maybe the best team in the NFL (say that to yourself again. “Maybe the best team in the NFL. Sounds good, eh?). Like when he saw there was no MLB lined up over center and called that QB sneak to pull within 3 then proceeded with the emphatic grown man spike I swear to God it moved a little bit

I love that playcall by Andy more than I’ll love my firstborn son someday.

It’s crazy how well this team is playing right now. So well that I’m actually kind of scared for what’s going to happen. Next week’s tilt in Buffalo against Sexy Rexy’s crew is certainly no easy task, but I think we should sneak out of there with a win which means we’d go into the bye week at 6-0 before playing in Pittsburgh with a healthy Big Ben… Maybe.

Remember when everyone thought the Bengals were going to go 6-10 this year?



Go Bengals.

PS- How bad was that Fox Sports broadcast, huh? Everything about it, from Buck and Aikman and the gang to shitty camera work to the stupid zipline camera angles. No gas, probably the worst professional football broadcast I’ve ever seen in my entire life. I have a new found respect for fans of NFC teams for being able to sit through 3 hours of that dogshit week after week after week. Not sure I could do the same.

About Q-Ball

Owner, operator Queencitybeerleague.com. AKA The Commish. Q-Ball is that asshole at the office who refuses to brew a fresh pot of coffee. Not because he doesn't want to, he's just too embarrassed to admit that he doesn't know how.
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