Let me ask you a question. Is anyone really gonna NOT eat Chipotle because of the whole Ecoli thing? I know that’s still the popular joke and I’m sure it’s in the back of your mind a little bit when you lace into a double steak and guac, but was the Chipotle Ecoli scare enough to really run anybody off for good? I guess if your home Chipotle was one of the primary establishments hit with the Ecoli strain that would be one thing, but I’m talking your average American dining at your average Chipotle franchise. When you decide to get food from a restaurant that sees literally thousands of people come through the door everyday, you have to accept the possibility that there’s a slim chance you may catch some sort of disease from someone or something you come in contact with. If you decide to swim in the ocean you might get bit by a shark, if you decide to have sex without a condom you might get AIDS, if you decide to eat raw meat that’s being handled by strangers you might get Ecoli. Deal with it. Besides, I’m not totally convinced Ecoli is even a real disease. When I was a kid I remember seeing a 60 Minutes special or something about a girl my age who died from Ecoli and I went about the rest of my life from then on out thinking Ecoli is basically the worst possible thing that can happen to a human being. It was only recently that I found out Ecoli just causes you to have some pretty violent bowel movements, which if we’re being honest happens to me more than it should anyway. In my mind Ecoli is one of those stupid children’s diseases like chicken pox or mono that’s serious when you’re a kid, but if you catch them as an adult you’re just a big weirdo with a shit immune system.
Here’s what it comes down to: Moe’s needs to put themselves on the map a little more if they really want to play Mr. Steal Your Girl. I came right out and said last week that Moe’s is superior to Chipotle but the only reason I don’t eat there is because there isn’t one around me. Think of it this way, would you rather date a 9 who lives all the way on the other side of the city or a nasty, ride or die 7 who lives right down the street? No brainer, you take the 7. If Moe’s really wants to sweep me off my feet, they’ll have to put a location or two in or immediately around the 45208 zip code, otherwise I’m playing hard to get until then.