Yesterday my best friend ADAm Pacman Jones posted this video to his Instagram page. Just a good friend of mine and a good family man enjoying a lazyWednesday afternoon at our local burger joint. Pretty standard stuff actually. What did take me by surprise though is that Pacman is one of those guys who douses his plate of fries with an entire bottle of Heinz. Now it’s well documented that it’s socially unacceptable and totally psychotic to enjoy your French fries this way, but if you came here to see me tear down folks one French fry at a time well then you came to the wrong place, my friend. Actually, I have a confession to make: I too eat my fries like a complete madman. I don’t supersoak them in ketchup or anything, rather I find myself eating my French fries with no ketchup at all. That is, on the rare occasion I actually order French fries, of course. I know that’s strange and wacky and it’s not like I don’t enjoy ketchup on my fries it’s just more of a convenience thing. I start eating fries straight out of the bag on the way home, one thing leads to another, and before you know it I’ve eaten a whole order of fries raw dog. So for those out there wondering how a guy like me and a guy like ADAm Pacman Jones end up becoming the bestest friends in the whole wide world, well here’s your answer. We both eat our French fries like serial killers.
Also sweet headwear